The Name

Meet Madison Edelle Low. The first name was easily decided upon as this is a name that both of us really liked and that subset is really small (only two names in it). The meaning of the name Madison, derived from its Hebrew heritage, is "Gift from the Lord" and this is the same meaning as Elijah's middle name (Chinese name). The name Madison also reflects her birth place and her mother's hometown, Madison, WI, a city named after one of the most admired founding father of America, James Madison, who was also the fourth President of the United States and is hailed as the “Father of the Constitution” for being the primary author of the United States Constitution and the author of the United States Bill of Rights.

Her middle name was really challenging because we wanted a name that means "nobel," and it has to be at least two syllables long as our last name is only one syllable. For those with a last name that is one syllable you will understand that having a one syllable middle or first name doesn't work because most people will pronounce both names as one word. For example, if we used a name like "Bee", most people will pronounce that name together with the last name and in our case, it will sound like  "Be-low." We also wanted a middle name that started with the initial "E" so that the initials of her name will be MEL. It was fantastic that we found a German name, "Edelle" meaning "nobel" and having a German name also reflects part of her heritage as Sarah is half German.

Checking on the popularity of the name suggest that it is one of the most popular names in the US and in the top 20% in Australia. However, it is very uncommon in other countries and so in a way she will have the best of both worlds. She will have a unique name globally but still have a popular name when she is in two countries - US and Australia.


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The Knowledge

This article is the last bit of wisdom we wish to share with the world. After this, everything revolves around Madison!

You will find so much advice out there that it can be overwhelming. Below are things i've found to be most helpful during the pregnancy and it may be different for other women. There is so much more advice to give but what is below is relevant to every woman in her child-bearing years, whether you are a first time mom or veteran!

1. Take Vitamins! - You are not superwomen and your body needs help. You are creating a new life and should respect that brand new life as though it were your own. Never take your pregnancy lightly, start with vitamins as soon as you begin planning or know that you are pregnant. God certainly didn't take any shortcuts when he made you and me, so don't do it to your baby.

2. Watch your weight gain! - Studies show a mothers weight gain during pregnancy will affect the fetus. Too much or too little weight gain by the mother can hurt the child causing problems in later life, such as high blood pressure and increased chances for a number of heart complications. Your weight gain should be based on your BMI at the start of your pregnancy (do not follow the average).

3. Exercise! - 2 kinds of exercise are important. One is the general walking and staying active. Moving around and keeping your stamina high is important at each new trimester, do lots of walking but avoid running you are not a runner to begin with. The second kind of exercise is the specific type where you focus on movements that strengthen the back and pelvic floor. Both of these kinds of exercise come in handy when delivering the baby and pushing that huge head thru your birth canal!

4. Read! - Always be aware of what is happening at each stage in the pregnancy (preferably before it happens). This is important for preparing you mentally and your body will react better - its the power of the mind! Give your mind a little information and watch it cope and do amazing things! Don't be one of those women that just rely on their doctor for information. There is so much you can learn on your own, this is a journey. I'm not asking you to write a paper or thesis on your pregnancy but do the basic reading at least for your baby's sake! You will feel empowered during the pregnancy and gain a deeper connection with the baby as well.

5. Ask a million questions! Ask your doctor, even if you know the answer because you consulted your best friend Google and every pregnancy website out there. Your doctor has seen more pregnancies and deliveries than you will see in your lifetime (unless you happen to be an OBGYN). He/She does have good information to offer and can explain things in a way that the internet failed. However, if the doctor does say something that goes agains your values or beliefs, just take it with a grain of salt and move on. Remember, combining information from your doctor AND other resources will be the best because your doctor will not tell you everything, firstly because there is too much to tell and secondly because he/she would not know what is specifically important or relevant to you.

6. Don't over google! In addition to point 4, be very carful to take in only enough information. There is a way to over do it (believe me I know). Remember, there are plenty of conflicting arguments out there for different things, talking about different research and so on. What is important is to look at the source and year of publication. Make sure what you are reading is up to date with the times. But at the end of the day, make decisions are that comfortable for you, the baby and your spouse, even if it is different from what your friends say (keeping in mind every pregnancy is different).

7. Share Everything! Some women think that because they are carrying the baby, their spouse has no role to play. This could not be farther from the truth. From the beginning, your spouse should be involved in the joy, research, decision making and even attend doctor visits! You may think you can do it alone but there comes a point in the pregnancy where you will need support. Hence the reason God made the pleasure of baby making to involve 2 people :) In fact, pregnancy can bring you and your spouse together to a whole new level making you a stronger couple. Just remember, that although sometimes he may not show interest (a trait men lack) does not mean he doesn't care.

8. Join an Online Community! I couldn't have imagined going through this pregnancy without other women who were also pregnant and going thru the same thing. Even more importantly, join a group of women who are due in the same month as you. Even though you may have slightly different experiences or symptoms, you are still at the same stage as them and can relate. Joining an online community of pregnant women also means you will get a good combination of first time mothers and women with children already. The benefit to having first time mothers in the group is that they will ask questions you forget to ask or are to shy to ask. With experienced mothers in the group they can share previous experiences and have lots of good information to offer (including baby brands that are good or stretch mark cream that doesn't work)!

9. Stay positive! This is easier said than done some days, but it is probably the most crucial. If you can maintain a healthy, positive attitude about your pregnancy no matter how challenging the changes and symptoms become, you will have an easier pregnancy altogether. Things to do to stay positive are joining an online community of pregnant women, involving your husband for support and understanding the changes as they occur. Remember, when you think things are bad, they can still  get worse, so be thankful for your situation!

10. Rinse and Repeat! You may not fully master all these skills or understand this information right away but it will slowly come to you as you progress thru your pregnancy. This is your journey. Take note of the things you liked and disliked and share your experiences with other as you have heard other share with you.

The Madison WI OBGYN

Our search for the best OBGYN in Madison, WI was interesting. We were transferring from another country in the last trimester of the pregnancy and we needed a doctor who could quickly get up to speed and possibly fill in the blanks if there are differences in the way medicine was practice between the countries. For most people, finding the best doctor is more like match making and they try to find a doctor they can feel comfortable with. This is a good approach for most people, however, our rationale and methodology for finding the best OBGYN was a bit different. First the rationale for finding the best doctor -- according to Steven Levitt, one of the top researchers who graduated from both Harvard and MIT, the skill level is approximately 10 years difference between a newly graduated doctor from a good school is as skilled as a doctor from an average school with 10 years experience, and in the unlikely event of a life threatening situation, you will have 20% higher chance of surviving if your doctor came from one of the top schools. Considering the our out of pocket cost is the same no matter which doctor we chose, it makes sense to choose the best doctor one can find because the cost is the same but the quality is drastically different (as measured by one's survival chance if something goes wrong).

So our methodology went something like this:

A. Check the ranking of the top medical schools from US News and they were rank as follows:
1. Harvard University
2. University of Pennsylvania
3. Johns Hopkins University

Full ranking is HERE.

B. Check with our insurance company, Anthem Blue Cross Blue Shield, on which hospitals they cover and found out that in Madison, they only cover 2 hospitals (Meriter and UW Health).

C. Next was the check the listing of the doctors in both hospitals and looked at their educational background to see which of the doctors attended the top 3 schools. Our search yielded only one doctor : Cynthia K. Anderson, MD. She completed her medical training at Johns Hopkins University and is now an assistant professor at the University of Wisconsin in addition to her practice at Meriter Hospital.

Well, that was the plan. Here is the reality -- it was a bit challenging getting Sarah to be Dr. Anderson's patient because she was in the midst of transfer and wasn't accepting any new patents. However, a combination of pleading and perseverance with the doctor and her administrative staff an arrangement was formed where Dr. Anderson at UW Health would see Sarah until her last two weeks when Dr. Anderson would be transferred to Meriter Hospital. At that point Sarah would still be with UW Health and will see two other doctors as a transition. Sarah would give birth at Meriter Hospital where Dr. Anderson is one of the 5 doctors on duty for the delivery of babies. So, there is a 1/5 chance that Dr. Anderson would deliver the baby. The actual doctor that delivers the baby will depend on who is on duty at the time Sarah goes into labor.

Below is an introductory video of Dr. Cynthia K. Anderson that we watched as part of the evaluation process.



This blog post is dedicated to all the new parents looking for the best doctor in their town. Looking at the statistics of our blog, we realize that one of the highest number of people visiting our website from a google search was searching for the terms "best obgyn" or equivalent and hopefully this post will help them on their journey.

The Precognition

As this pregnancy draws to a close, I find some things getting easier as I learn to live with the changes and yet some things become more difficult as even more changes occur. Below are things I wish people (or at least my research) would have told me.

1. Relaxin creates a love-hate relationship! This hormone is responsible for preparing the pelvic floor to push a baby's head and body thru the birth canal. Sounds simple enough. As the name implies, Relaxin relaxes the joints in the pelvis, however it cause 'abnormal motion' in many other joints also! With the increase in the body's creation of the hormone Relaxin, there is and increasing amount of pelvic pain and lower back pain in the last month (although there are increased levels of Relaxin already present as early as 20 weeks, it is less noticeable as the weight of the uterus and belly have yet to grow to full size). So what am I saying? I feel as though someone took my legs and stretched them to the side, forcing me to do the splits!!! And my back is burning from the pain as if someone pierced a rod thru the lower portion connecting my spine and pelvic bone. Explained another way, it is like holding a house together with rubber bands. Other than that I'm good!

In future: So no one mentioned this although my research did occasionally say to expect lower back pain in the last weeks to become worse. They just didn't tell me how bad it would be! If you just told me that Relaxin increases by 10 times its normal concentration during pregnancy, I would have caught on and done something about it. So, while I remained active and exercised, what I lacked was the right kind of exercise to handle this hormone. It is important to do specific exercises to strengthen the back and pelvic floor so the 9th month is easier and less painful.

2. From all the stories I heard and all the research I did I was ready for any and all symptoms. Mostly I thought I would have all the symptoms mentioned! So for example at week 7, I thought I would develop a full list of symptoms and have to live with them… and each week or trimester would be different. Little did I know, that not all the symptoms are present for every woman in every pregnancy. Those are just common symptoms women may experience.

In future: It can be totally normal to not have the major symptoms mentioned by all the online resources and books out there. Each pregnancy is different and each body is different and reacts differently from the changes. Finally half way through the pregnancy I realized there was nothing wrong with me and that I truly was pregnant, but in a way my body handled it! From that point on, when people told me their stories, I managed to keep my head on straight by repeating to myself "Every pregnancy is different!"

3. My personality is such that when there is something new to me or something I don't know, I must find out more about it… in detail. The problem comes in when you live in the 21st century and everyone's best friend happens to be Google! Today there is a risk of information overload that threatens us at every click. Early on in the pregnancy I knew everything there was to know about that stage and I was like a live, walking, talking wikipedia. The problem was it did me no good. In fact, it began to overwhelm me because I had so much information and sometimes the information was controversial and conflicted based on different views! So all that information became useless and frustrating to me.

In future: Thanks to my personality, I quickly learned to adjust how I went about doing my research. Start the trimester and each week with a general read up of what is happening to your body and baby as the pregnancy develops. Be aware (but only vaguely) of the possible symptoms you may encounter or changes that can happen. Finally, as you experience certain symptoms that concern you or that you don't understand, research just those and find out ways to cope and understand your body better. There is no point in learning about every single symptom if it doesn't apply to you. It will only turn you into a worry wart and possibly implode that fuzzy little brain of yours.

The Wait

We've finished all the classes, all the preparations, and all the last minute errands. Now the wait begins. It could be a matter of days at this point.

There are no more doctor appointments before she is due to arrive. But I have one scheduled after her due date on the 28th, just in case. She has always had her own plans and she clearly has a mind of her own, so she will decide when it is time and no one can convince her otherwise!

God has been so good to me during this pregnancy. I've had so many different doctors see me over the last few weeks and each one has pointed out that i've had a very straightforward pregnancy. How true. It has been easy. Despite the changes in my body, which I thought would be a problem, God has really had His hand on this pregnancy and has prepared me each step of the way. The biggest thing He has done for me is prepared me mentally to be a mom. At each major change and transition in the last 9 months, He has kept me calm and relaxed. Decisions never became too overwhelming to handle.

A lot of guys have said to me that there is nothing to prepare for and when the baby finally arrives nothing else matters. But what guys don't understand is that the process of becoming a mom starts from the moment of conception. It is a change not only physically but mentally as well. Pregnancy is something guys can never understand as they can never experience it, except from a distance. It can be scary, overwhelming, and very emotional at times. Having said this, I must also say that I've been blessed with such a good husband, who went out of his way to understand me at every stage and change and never made light of what I was going through. His involvement and support during this pregnancy has made it easy for me to adjust and I couldn't have made it this far without him!

With all this time on my hands now, my mind could potentially go into over drive trying to understand the journey and how I got this far. What I think is important now is to wait patiently for God's timing, for it won't be long! Who knows, maybe this will be my last blog post before she arrives!!!

The Online Hospital Visit

We are blessed to have many friends around the world and we know that some of you would have loved to visit us in the hospital when our baby is born. However, we have yet to have access to a star trek transporter technology so we would have to do things the old fashion way and provide an online visit when the baby is born. This is how we hope it will work - when the baby is born, we will send out an email invitation to all those who would like to visit the baby and you can visit the baby online through your computer while we are still in the hospital. As we have no idea what day the baby will be born, we can only set the time at:
8:30am : Central Time - CST
2:30pm : London Time
9:30pm : Malaysia & Singapore Time
11:30pm : Melbourne & Sydney Time (Sorry, but someone had to get the late shift)

Please indicate which days you can make it for the online hospital visit, so that we know who to invite to the online visit. Please fill up this online form :
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/viewform?formkey=dEU0cTAzMENoSXVVNkRfVlJYT0tlcUE6MQ

When the baby is born, we will email all those who have indicated they are available for an online hospital visit and you will receive an email with the invitation. It will be a live video conference where we will have the baby present and will be able to talk to you.

We will also be posting updates on facebook when Sarah goes into labor. To receive updates, please make sure you are a friend of Sarah on facebook.

The Hospital Tour

Our first impression of the Meriter Hospital's birthing room was, "Wow." I was expecting a hospital room type feel to it but instead was surprised with what looked like a hotel room. On one side of the wall was a glass partition that leads into a bathroom with a whirlpool / jacuzzi. The room has a large flat screen TV with build in DVD player and other multimedia options for entertainment. The tour guide starts the tour with, "When you arrive please pull up at the front so that our valet can take care of your car. This is free." I was impressed and it just got better after that. On the floor of the birthing room is a kitchen providing free food and if that is not sufficient, they have a menu that looked like something from a restaurant. The birthing room itself is fully self contained, meaning that during the delivery of the baby they won't be bringing in any medical equipment as all the equipment is already in the room -- but here is the kicker, you can't see medical equipment because they are all concealed and only taken out of their hiding place as needed. Even the surgical lights are recessed into the ceiling and the lights follow a remote control that the doctor holds in his hand. The tour guide talked about some major changes in the hospital customs due to recent research including the baby now sleeps in the same room with the mother at all times (the nursery is usually empty), the mother is able to deliver the baby at any posture (the bed is specially designed to accommodate any position including squatting), comfort of the mother is placed at the highest priority and all sort of bouncy balls, hydrotherapy or acupuncture (if requested) is made available. Clearly delivering a baby will be painful and uncomfortable but our hospital really goes to incredible lengths to provide support and comfort.

Some of the freebies we get in addition to all the special treatment include:

• Professional photographer paid for by the hospital
• Swaddle blanket
• Thermometer and a few baby first aid items
• Hand knitted beanie
  

The Gift Registry

We are blessed to have very generous family and friends. We are also blessed to have family and friends from all around the world. Recently, at the baby shower, Sarah's sister, Jamie, made a diaper cake as shown in the picture on the left. It had our baby's first cellphone on it and of course the compulsory "I love my Aunt" and "I love my Uncle" bib on it.

We had a number of people ask us, how they could give a gift to the baby. In America, it is customary to have a baby gift registry to make it easier for people to give gifts. The way it works is that we preselect a number of items that we would like for the baby and of course, there is also gift certificate (similar to giving cash) on the list. Just click on the link below to buy gifts for the baby and Amazon will take care for the rest.

http://www.amazon.com/registry/baby/AYVOI6TDWB9M

For my Husband

"Every woman deserves a man who calls her baby, kisses her like he means it, holds her tight like he never wants to let go. Doesn't cheat, wipes her tears when she cries, doesn't make her jealous of other women; instead makes other women jealous of her, is not scared to let his friends know how he really feels about her, and let's her know how much he really loves her."

God is so good to me, because I've been blessed with such a man! This blog posting is dedicated to him. He has been my strength through this time of transition and best friend during this new journey. I never imagined a baby could bring us even closer together than we already are, but something is shifting and getting stronger! There is no doubt in my mind that he will be the greatest dad the world has ever seen!

Dear, I love you with all my being!

The 36wk check

Today was my 36+3 week check. The doctor completed a cervical exam and concluded I was 2cm dilated and 50% effaced. The dilation has begun but it will progress slowly until I reach a dilation of 4cm, then who knows from there how long it will be :)

I'm just very glad my body is doing what it should be doing! Let the fun begin.

The EDD: Sept 24

Her estimated due date is September 24th!

Shout out: That day is special for Alex and Soo Yin too because they will be getting married! Congrats to them. Looking forward to the live video stream of their wedding.

Today I am 35 weeks 1 Day! I have 35 days to go, though I doubt she will arrive on that exact date just because I tell her to! 

Interesting facts:

1. Before pregnancy, the uterus is a small ball the size of your fist and was tucked away neatly behind the pelvis. Today, it is the size of a honeydew melon, reaching all the way up to the ribs!

2. 1/6th of all the body's total blood volume is navigating around in the vessels in the uterus!

3. Baby's nails are growing so long they may curl over the tips of the fingers and toes! She will need a mani and pedi upon arrival!

4. Baby's weight is now around 5.5 lbs (2.38 kg) and 18-18.5 inches in length!

5. The majority of development over the next 5 weeks will be packing on the pounds (gaining weight), Yikes!!!!

The More the Merrier

After sitting thru the Breastfeeding class with me, Elijah is convinced we need more classes! He immediately came home and signed up for the "Baby's First Weeks" class (description below) which is scheduled for September 8th.

Either the Breastfeeding class freaked him out (not likely) and he is convinced we need all the help we can get or he thinks the classes have more to offer than we initially realized. As for me, I found the class so insightful I wouldn't mind signing up for every class available (if time and money were not a factor). The classes also help to pass the time and keep me from going insane with impatience waiting for her arrival.

September is our busiest month so far. Between doctor appointments, birthing classes, and last minute preparations for her arrival I may not have time to stop and take in a breath of fresh air! But I would rather the last moth go by fast rather than drag on. When my mind and body are idle, I go insane. I'm really looking forward to September!

"Baby's First Weeks" Class Description:
"Your baby will be born eager to get to know you. We are just as eager for you to learn about your baby. This class covers the characteristics, sensory skills and abilities of a newborn. It also covers the basics of infant care, common concerns and when to seek medical advice. Be better prepared for your homecoming so that you will fully enjoy your first weeks together."

The Thumping

For a while now I've noticed that the LO will start thumping between 10 and 11 at night. It is every night without fail. At first I thought it was only when I laid down on my left side (which does trigger it sometimes), but the thumping started last night while I was still sitting up and wide awake.

It literally is a rhythmic thumping movement that is not rough or sharp but deliberate and consistent. For the life of me, I can't figure out what she is up to. Elijah thinks she is drumming! But we don't have any drummers in either of our families so where did that come from.

At first this worried me and I thought something might be wrong. But I know now she is fine as she is active throughout the day and sleeps most of the night without interruption. Then I thought it might be hiccups. But what are the chances that she would get the hiccups around the same time every night and several hours after I've eaten. Wouldn't she get the hiccups right after I've eaten? When the flavor of my meal can be tasted in the amniotic fluid (that is when babies swallow more)?

I'm keen to see my doctor on Tuesday and ask her about it. I hope she has an answer.

The Time to Panic

This soon to be mommy has a billion things left to do! They say pregnancy creates an instinct or urge to prepare the home for the upcoming newborn! When will my nesting instinct kick in?

Haven't washed her clothes or blankets yet!

Haven't set up her crib/bassinet! -Which was given by my sis-in-law.

Haven't packed my hospital bag! - Which is so unlike me because i'm not a last minute packer.

Haven't finalized my birth plan! - I'm hoping the doc will help me with that.

Haven't bought her car seat! - By far the most important thing in my opinion otherwise she can't come home from the hospital.

Haven't finished reading all the books and material the hospital gave me! - I had 9 months and I can't think where all the time went.

My last 2 birthing classes are in September and one of them is 2 weeks before my due date! That was me procrastinating and refusing to sign up earlier :(

Non pregnancy related, I have my road test on September 2nd because I don't have my license and that is the earliest I can schedule it… oh and it is at 7:25am! No choice… the next test would have been in October. I will either be very pregnant then or have a 1 week old baby. YIKES!

Oh and I'm planning to attend all the late summer/autumn festivals (corn festival, watermelon seed speed spitting competition, Tastes of Wisconsin festival, etc)  i've dearly missed over the years while away, most of which are in September!

Despite everything I need to do, i'm surprisingly calm and relaxed… where did that come from??? I asked Elijah the other night when I was suppose to start panicking about this baby and everything that still needs to be done. He said there was no need to panic… until I go into labor and reach the hospital. I suspect he was referring to when he would start panicking!

The Hot Pregnancy

When I left Malaysia, I thought things would be easier with the weather in Madison. Less humidity is something I was really looking forward to. But then I got to Madison and I can't stand the dry heat! Based on the weather app, there is hardly any difference!

This coming week will be cooler I hope. But the weather here can also be unpredictable.

This is so frustrating. August seems to be the hottest month and we have some rain which cools things down but then it also brings on the humidity (though not as much as Malaysia). I also realized how much I have relied on the air conditioning in Malaysia. In my father's house there is no central air conditioning. There is a window unit in our bedroom and a portable one in the kitchen/dining room. Despite this, I still struggle with the heat. Perhaps it is just being pregnant. But then I look at Elijah and he seems to be suffering just as much as me.

We have decided that on the hottest days, we will go to the library in town and set up office! The library offers book rentals straight to our iPads! It's a pretty cool library and well air conditioned. And I can read all the baby books they have!

I'm very glad the little one is coming in late September when things cool down. I've heard from friends and family that babies born in summer are very hard to keep cool and take care of. Looks like the little one and I will be eating lots of ice cream to stay cool this summer! The price I pay to stay cool :)

The Classes

Today Elijah and I enrolled in 2 courses at the hospital. The “Holistic Birth” class is a 2-part session that covers labor and delivery. The other class is one session on “Breastfeeding Basics.”

We also enrolled for a one hour hospital tour where they show the labor rooms, post-delivery rooms, and other facilities. That is on the 7th of September, which was the earliest we could get and the last opening before my due date - and even that was the last 2 spaces so only Elijah and I can go, but it is free, so I can't complain.

We are very excited to take these classes and meet other parents in the area! Reading books can only get you so far. The real value comes in interacting with experts and others in the class.

Class descriptions:

Holistic Birth: This 2-week class focuses on pain-coping techniques, the partner’s role and gaining confidence as you prepare for an unmedicated birth. The class also covers birth plans and use of "alternative" therapies.

Breastfeeding Basics: Learn about the advantages of breastfeeding, and receive tips for a positive and successful experience. Learn to recognize your baby's hunger cues, how to properly position your baby to feed and how to make sure the latch is correct. A lactation consultant or counselor will guide you through the basics of breastfeeding in the early days and weeks. Couples should attend during mid to late pregnancy.

Birthing Center Tour: You will see the Birthing Center, a birthing suite, and a post-partum room.

The most unbelievable dream so far

It seems the dreams have returned and are getting more and more absurd. Some parts are realistic while others are bizarre. And some parts are horrifying!

This last dream has a few elements of each.

I dreamt I was rushed to the hospital. We thought we had at least a few hours to settle in, but the baby came very quickly we didn't even have time to inform family or friends that we were at the hospital. Out comes the baby and she is huge!!! Huge as in, at least 6 months old already because she can sit up on her own. I do remember thinking how beautiful she looked and her eyes were very enchanting.

Anyway, immediately after delivery I rushed to the gym center to book a weight loss package with the gym before they sold out of memberships. In the dream Elijah was also rushing for a meeting. So after I finished, we rushed back and got home to realize we left the baby at the hospital!!! End of dream.

What kind of parents forget their baby? I'm such a worry-bug and now I've added to the list of worries (1)forgetting my baby and (2)being a horrible parent.

The Traveller's Life

I've never really thought about travelling before. It has always come naturally and is easy for me. But something has changed. I still love travelling, but as I find myself pregnant and getting closer to moving to the US to set up house for a few months I struggle with the thought of leaving friends and family behind (even if only for a short period). 

As most of my travels have been a month or shorter, I've never looked back when leaving because I knew I would return shortly. Each place I visit on my travels feels like home. With friends all over the globe, when travelling I feel like I'm going from one home to the next.

But now I can't help but choke back tears when I think of leaving friends and family behind. And yet I am going 'home'. Back to the place I grew up, to the place where most of my family lives. 

Reflecting on the commonly used saying: "Home is where the heart is" I realise now that the heart is always where family is. And so my home is anyplace with family. Going back to the US is going to be an adventure and getting ready for a little one will be challenging but what better place to do it than surrounded by family!

The 3D/4D Scan (Part 2)

Here she is!

The scan went as well as can be. Our first try was not so successful. She was turned inward toward my pelvis and had her hands covering her face. So the doctor checked all the vital organs, like liver, heart, lungs while waiting for her to reposition herself. He also checked her spine. Everything was in perfect order (not that I had expected anything less). It is just common procedure to check all the important things.

The doctor asked that I come back 30 minutes later for another try. He suggested I walk around and have something sweet to drink. This would help to reposition her. We sat at Starbucks for those 30 minutes talking to her. I was rubbing my belly and asking her to cooperate with the doctor. I must have looked silly but I didn't care. Elijah also talked to her and asked that she show us her pretty face! So 30 minutes later we went back. And sure enough, she had repositioned and we got a better look at her face! Half of her face this time, but it is better than no face. Her hands were still near her face but not in the way, too much. Her estimated weight is 1100 grams or 2 lbs 7ozs.

It was a really awesome experience and we are happy with the visit. The doctor was gentle and very experienced. Enjoy the videos!

The 3D/4D Scan

Over the last few months, as I go for checkups, the doctor performs a 2D ultrasound scan of my growing uterus to monitor the baby's growth. This week, Elijah and I will go for a 3D/4D scan. A 3D scan is more than sending sound waves straight down and reflecting back. Instead the sound waves are sent at different angles which then returns echos that are fed into a sophisticated computer program which reconstructs a three dimensional image of the fetus. 3D scans allow us to see width, height, and depth of the image, but not movement.

This is where 4D plays a role. 4D is similar to 3D but adds the element of time. It brings still images to life and allows us to see movement as it is happening, rather than getting a delayed image.

There is some controversy surrounding this technology as it is fairly new (having been developed at Duke University in 1987). Some arguments claim it is harmful to the fetus because of the sound waves that intrude the uterus walls. However, there is no basis for this as neither the mother nor the fetus can hear or feel the ultrasounds produced. In addition, there has been no associated mental defects to the fetus or harm to the mother directly attributed to 2D or 3D ultrasounds. The intensity of the ultrasound waves is set into the machine so it does not exceed FDA standards. So contrary to common belief, 3D scans are not harmful in any way to the fetus or mother (unless thru excessive use, even then there is no conclusive evidence of harm).

To ensure we have the best doctor and equipment for 3D/4D scans, our obstetrician recommended Fetal Medicine & Gynaecology. This center specializes in fetal development and has the latest machines available for 3D/4D scans. They only entertain a client if they have been give a doctor's referral and will not accept walk-ins. Their office is in Jaya One and their website is www.fmgc.com.my.

The ideal time for a 3D scan is between 26 to 28 weeks, to get the best images. At this time the fetus is just the right size (without descending too far into the pelvis) and has the right amount of fluid surrounding it to provide the best image. Our appointment has been made for the end of week 26 (perfectly spaced between my regular doctor appointments).

As 'futuristic' parents, we believe it is important to use the latest technology that medical science has to offer. We believe this cutting edge technology will become common place in all pregnancies in the future and wanted to be one of the first to experience it. Stayed tuned for the update to follow the appointment!

The Pregnancy Brain

For those reading this that have had a partner who was pregnant at one time or other, you may relate to the strange behavior I will now write about.

Pregnancy brain. A simple concept but one that can be frustrating and annoying for both the pregnant woman and her spouse. Other words used to describe 'pregnancy brain' are ditzy, flaky, brain fog, clumsy, dippy and scatterbrained (just to name a few). If you still haven't figured it out by now, it refers to the forgetfulness and sometimes bizarre behavior that results from being pregnant. Some say it is hormones, other say they can't explain it but it is a very real 'symptom' of pregnancy. Let me give you some examples.

On one occasion I actually stepped into the shower with my bra still on! I can't explain it, but it is a very strange feeling to forget something so basic.

At another time I tried to turn on the air con with my phone… What's that about? No explanation.

Later that day I found the remote control in my makeup case... in the bathroom. Elijah saw it there and didn't say anything, he probably didn't want to ask!

Another good example of my ditzy brain, happened one morning while I was getting ready. After I finished getting ready, I told Elijah that we could leave anytime. He gave me a funny look and asked if I was sure that I wanted to dress that way. I looked down to figure out what could possibly be wrong with my chosen attire and found that I was still wearing my pajama bottoms. Apparently, I had done my makeup, combed my hair and changed my top. But I had forgotten to change my bottoms! I'm so glad Elijah was there to warn me. That could have been a very embarrassing situation had I gone out alone.

Now that you all have had a good laugh at my expense, I have nothing more to say, except that none of these events can be explained, so "It's the baby's fault!"

The Battle of the Bulge

It may sound strange but some days I feel smaller than others. Whats more is that I find the bump is smaller some days compared with others. I've finally figured it out and realize what is going on.

On days when the bump seems smaller, I find she is snuggled up closer to my back and spine and laying low in my pelvic region. This makes it hard to sit down for long periods of time and also results in more lower back pain. But overall, nothing too difficult that I can't handle.

On days when the bump is bigger and rounder, I find she is happily cozied right in the middle and tends to be more active those days. My belly button is slowly beginning to pop out. It may not fully push out but it is certainly changing.

And don't get my started on the days when my belly looks lopsided! Some days she favors one side over the other, usually my left! But more often than not I will wake up with a bulge on one side and as the day progresses it becomes more evened out.

As she grows, the little one will not have much space to move around and my belly will stop fluctuating in size! Until then, it is quite amusing to see how each day can be so different from the next.

The Double Digit Countdown

Baby Bump Application on the iPhone

99 days and counting...

The average length of pregnancy is 266 days from the time of conception or more commonly used by doctors, 280 days from the start of the last menstrual period.

Either way I'm in my double digit countdown already and can't believe how fast time flies! Of course I know that only 5% of women actually deliver on their due date and I also know that the first time pregnancy can take longer than the estimated due date. However, it is still 99 days till I'm in the zone! I wonder how the next 99 days will feel... fast, slow, blurry??? Any ideas?

The Bump @ 25weeks 6days

All Girl!

I can still see my feet...kinda!

It is nice to have a husband who not only loves taking photos but is good at it! We both had fun with this.

The Movements

Its amazing how fast things really move when pregnant. Of course waiting nine months to see the baby isn't all that fast. However, progressing from one stage and new development to the next takes place fairly quickly.

The most amazing change yet is feeling the baby kick, punch, squirm, and have the hiccups. I admit, sometimes its unpleasant, especially with a full bladder or when I really want to sleep, but most times it is enjoyable and fun to sit, relax and try to anticipate the baby's next move!

I first felt her move at 19 weeks and now i feel like a pro at recognizing movement. I know when she is having the hiccups or when she kicks. Punching is generally softer and not noticeable by looking at my tummy. She is fairly active after meals and in the evening.

I often wonder how Elijah feels not being able to experience the kicks firsthand. I want to feel bad for him and all dads-to-be, yet a small part of me is happy because it is something only I share with my little girl. After all, in 3 short months, I will have to share her with the rest of the world!

The 24 week scan and Pregnancy Highlights

The 24 week scan went very well. Managed to pass some baby cake to my doctor! For the doubting Thomas' out there, I asked my doctor to check again to make sure he did not make a mistake with the gender. So he scanned over to her back end and showed me her very tiny little butt and the "white lines" that indicate girl (as opposed to a boy that would show what looks like swelling between the legs). I admit, that I was beginning to second guess the doctor's assessment after hearing all the stories that people are so willing to share regarding someone they know having a boy when they thought it was a girl. Now, I have complete confidence in my doctor and I saw with my own eyes that she is all girl!

24 Weeks - Head on right (can clearly see eyes, nose and mouth)

Pregnancy Highlights:
How Far Along: 24 weeks
Size of baby: Corn
Maternity Clothes: Finally got a pair of maternity jeans, that are a bit big for now and some new dresses that I love! Most of my tops ride up over my belly button, so they are in the storage bin for now :)
Gender: 100% GIRL
Name: We've selected the first name but can't seem to find the right middle name just yet.
Movement: She is an active little one… her punches are soft, but her kicks are strong! She settles down when I play the music from the baby snow globe Grandma and Grandpa Low gave her!
Heartbeat: 136 beats per minute!
What I miss: Bak Kut The, peanut butter and soft serve ice cream
Symptoms: Occasional heartburn and swollen ankles. There is certainly no shortage of backaches by the middle of the day.
Medications: Prenatal vitamins, Calcium and Omega 3 
Best Moment this week: The doctor appointments are always my favorite!
Funny Moment this week: My baby brain gets annoying at times, I tried turning on the air con with my phone!

24 week scan details:
Estimated Fetal Weight: 757 grams
Head: 60.3mm (equivalent to 24wks 4 days)
Abdominal Circumference: 196.3mm (equivalent to 24wks 2day)
Femur Length: 46.7mm (equivalent to 25wks 4day)

Translating these numbers: Basically the baby is right on schedule, development is normal and she is tall (hmmm, I wonder where she gets that from)!

The Trimester Breakdown

I'm getting really confused about how far a long I actually am. There are so many different breakdowns of week by week and what weeks start a new trimester. Some say the second trimester ends with the 26th week. Other calculations say it ends with the 28th week. So which is it? Over night I went from thinking i was in my 5th month to being in my 6th month!

I guess which month I'm in is less important than the week. After all, it is still a 40 week countdown despite which month the weeks fall in. Today, I'm 23 weeks and 7 days!

The First Letter

My mom was inspired to write the baby a letter, she read it to me and I nearly cried. So I thought I would share it all with you. Baby's first letter from Grandma Bristol!

Dear Little One,

How wonderful it is to know you will arrive in September and be the center of everyone’s admiration and love. You have already commanded everyone’s attention.

I have followed your growth and activity since we knew you were more than a desire.  It has been fun for me to experience your Mommy’s wonderment that you were growing inside her. She and Daddy have written Baby Journals and weekly blogs to keep everyone informed and entertained. We saw her bump grow and we even saw ultrasounds of you. So precious!

What fun we had at the G.A.P. celebration. Mom and Dad announced your gender at the party. Mom was shocked and so happy as they sliced and pulled out a pink  chunk of cake. I could see clearly on Dad’s beaming face the joy and happiness as I measured the width of his smile. I could easily see he was truly thrilled about having a little girl to spoil. Later Mom mentioned how much fun Dad had picking out your first clothes. Mostly ALL pink, of course.

Soon you will be born in Madison at the same hospital your Mommy was born in 24 years earlier. How special for her.

It may be difficult for me to fly to the states for your birth but I will not miss any of the excitement thanks to skype. I will for sure see you face to face and hold you at Christmas. I can hardly wait!

In the meantime, be good to Mom and Dad and Grandpa. See you in September.

Love you more than I can say,

GRAM

The Braxton Hicks contractions

Felt my first contraction at 4am this morning (week 23). I feel like I'm breezing through this pregnancy!!! It felt like just yesterday that I first felt the baby move and then found out it was a girl and now the contractions! I'm enjoying every minute of this pregnancy, except the days when the hormones really kick in to overdrive and all I want to do is cry for no reason… But this blog is not about my stupid hormones, it's about the contractions.

Now before you freak out (those of you who are not familiar with pregnancy), Braxton Hicks contractions are normal. What it is, is sporadic uterine contractions. In simple English, it feels like a tightening in the stomach and lower abdomen region. They are said to aid the body in its preparation for birth. These contractions actually begin around 6 weeks but are not noticeable till after midway through pregnancy. Some women may not even feel them. However, they are completely normal. It will continue to occur but will remain infrequent, irregular, and painless up until the last weeks of pregnancy. They get their name from an English doctor who first described them in 1872, John Braxton Hicks.

I'm so glad everything is right on track!

The Growth (Part 1)

Today marks the first day of Week 23! More than half way there and the time has simply disappeared. I'm certainly in no hurry for the next half to be over but I can't help imagining what it will be like to hold my baby girl for the first time… knowing me, I'll be so emotional and my eyes will be full of tears that I won't be able to see at all. Speaking of growing, this blog post, part 1 of 3, will cover the last 4 weeks of the second trimester (month 6) and the growth of the baby in comparison to fruits and vegetables, based on my BabyBump iPhone app!!

[From week 21 on, measurements are taken from head to toe.]


Week 23
Large Mango
11.5 inches
.499 kg

Week 24
Corn
12.5 inches
.567 kg

Week 25
Rutabaga
13.5 inches
.680 kg

Week 26
Hothouse Cucumber
14 inches
.794 kg

The Name

The most common question we've been asked the last few weeks is "What gender is the baby?" And until just recently we had no clue. Now that we know, the question on everyone's mind is "What's her name?"

That has certainly been our mind for a very long time, even before starting a family, we agreed that the name was a very important part of who she will become. Names have meanings and we believe this will be a major part of her character growing up. Hence, any name we consider, goes through a 'background check.'

We had chosen and narrowed down both the boy names and girl names before finding out the gender. Now, our focus is on the girl. However, we are still working on a boy name in the event, at delivery, I happened to have a boy :) I guess you can say, it is in our nature to always have a back up plan.

As for the girl names we have gone through many and only 2 remain on our list.
1. Madison - meaning "son of the mighty warrior" Its origin is Old English and is commonly use for boys and girls.
2. Aurora - meaning "Dawn". Latin in origin and used by 19th-century poets. Also used in some versions of the fairy tale "Sleeping Beauty" with Princess Aurora.

[Based on www.thinkbabynames.com]

We are also working on middle names that have important meanings and compliment the first name. We have found that the middle name is harder to decide on than the first. But we will get there, after all we have a deadline we can't delay!

The Food

At this stage the baby is gulping down several ounces of amniotic fluid everyday. This is for both nutrition as well as to practice swallowing and digesting. But more importantly, the taste buds are actually working. Studies show that babies respond best to tastes they've already encountered via the amniotic fluid. This means every time I bite into my sandwich, I'm preparing my baby for food it will favor in the future.

This got us thinking. What kind of food do we want our child to eat. Certainly not junk food, but what types?

The Top 10 Most Tasty Cuisines:
1. French
2. Italian
3. Chinese
4. Indian
5. Thai
6. Mexican
7. Japanese
8. Spanish
9. Greek
10. Lebanese

Based on this list we are focusing on 5 of these cuisines: Italian (representing western), Chinese, Indian, Mexican and Japanese. We are choosing these partly because they are my (Sarah) favorites (not in that order) but also because each one has distinctly different tastes from the other types. Each one uses different spices in various ways to bring out the best in the dish.

I'm really enjoying northern Indian food more these days and I need curry at least once a week. I'm also undertaking a study of my own to see if I can train the baby to like durian. Elijah is convinced the baby won't like it, partly because all the first born in his family do not eat durian and partly because I didn't feel very good on Friday after gorging myself with the best durian money can buy. Nevertheless, I'm determined to try. Anyone interested in taking me for durian?!?!?!

The Baby Gap Photos!

20 weeks

The Last Trimester

Apple used to have the slogan, "Think Different", I think our lives reflect, "Do Different." As you are aware, we do things different. We plan to deliver the baby in Madison, Wisconsin, USA, Sarah's hometown. And as it turns out, delivery will be in the exact same hospital that Sarah was born in. Of course, you are all invited to visit the baby in October in Madison. We will be traveling in November, either in the UK or South Africa and will be in Malaysia from the second half of December, back in time for Christmas and New Years.

So, why did we choose to have the baby born in America? We do not want to limit the possibility of our child having the opportunity to be the President of the United States and it is a constitutional requirement that to be President one must be born in the US. There is also the possibility that our child could be the Prime Minister of another country but as far as we know, most other countries don't have that requirement of birth place to qualify.

The doctor prefers that we travel before the last week of July, so, we are aiming to travel at the latest date possible, around July 25th. We will post frequent updates on this blog so that our family and friends from around the world can continue to be connected with us during this period. And despite the time zone difference, you will find us online almost everyday through skype and facebook.